on life’s timing

January 3, 2020 – Let’s get something out of the way – my favorite musician of all time is Trevor Hall. I often joke with people that his music is my therapy because I can’t afford a real therapist. I’m only half-joking. One, because I could make it work to go to a real therapist, I just haven’t quite been able to do it yet (baby steps). And two, because his music is one of the only things I know that can calm me down when I’m in full-on panic mode. It’s both nostalgic and nuanced, and the songs never get old for me, year after year.

So it only makes sense that my 2020 mantra would stem from his lyrics. I was listening to his album during one of my recent travels and one line jumped out at me (don’t you love when old music becomes new again?).

Everything right on time.

Yes! I repeat these words and my body softens. The edges I’ve drawn for myself grow rounded. It’s the kind of reassurance I’m craving – that the sequence of my life is right. I think it’s often what we need to hear. Much of the world seems to be in disarray right now, and not without good reason. But, without dismissing justice and action, I believe we should also give ourselves some grace and trust in the timing. Everything is happening the way it was meant to, as much as that brings pain and confusion and sadness sometimes. We are, after all, not the center of the universe. And the line also speaks to a certain strength in knowing your timing, despite what other people reflect. Being able to say, “this is right for me” even when it’s different or uncomfortable. I know, those four words are a lot to process.

In a barre class I took recently, the instructor, sizing up the classroom full of New Year’s resolution-setters, brought up a perspective that I found refreshing and desperately necessary. She asked us to look at our goals/resolutions/intentions for the year and see if we could flip them so they’re less about punishing ourselves (stop eating unhealthy foods, exercise X times a week, go to bed earlier, etc.) and more about celebrating ourselves (eat more foods that make you feel good, celebrate your strength and build upon it, give yourself the rest you need, etc.)

I should share that I choose to do mantras for each year instead of resolutions. I tried to resolution thing for many years, and often found that only one of them really stuck with me – usually the one that was most abstract, coincidentally. I also used to do this for my birthday each year, along with some goals. I still enjoy goal-setting on my birthday, but decided to move my mantra up to the new year. There, now you have the full background. So, in the spirit of my barre teacher’s challenge and despite the slight delay, I’ve decided to take my yearly mantra one step further.

Celebrate life’s timing.

Instead of waiting for big milestones, I want to celebrate the little things – the fun curveballs that life throws and how they shape this journey. I want to build trust in my timing and put more of my energy into making a positive change. Ah. I’m so excited for you, 2020!